I got flowers today

Making New Memories

I write this post, sitting aboard a British Airways flight, plastic cup of water in front of me and shaking hands. I’m scared of flying you see, I’m not scared...

Finding Freedom- part two

You’ve left. You’re out. You’re free… Or are you? What happens next? Is that it? Does life return to the way it was before you met your abuser? One of...

Finding Freedom - part one

Leaving an abusive relationship is only the beginning. It’s what comes next that can be the hardest part. Staying away from your abuser if you are still in love with...

I am enough

Self esteem is something that so many of us struggle with. I met a lady the other day who could quite happily say out loud, ‘I am fabulous.’ Apart from...

Finding Her Again

An abuser will not only endeavour to take his victims self worth, control of her own decisions, life choices and confidence, he will also try to take away all of...

The power of fear

One of the main reasons for my staying put was the very thought of trying to leave and knowing what that would mean. To people on the outside, or those...

The beginning of the end… continued

It’s been a while since my last post. There was no real reason why at first, life just got in the way, but then I started writing again, and it...

The beginning of the end

"Not only is leaving an abusive relationship hard, sometimes seemingly impossible, it is dangerous. At the time of leaving, and in the days, weeks or months after, the victim is...

A letter to her

Dear friend, I’m sorry. I’m sorry I made you sad. I’m sorry reading my story hurt you. I’m sorry you were able to relate to it. I’m sorry you saw...

The Addicted Abuser

Addiction. It’s like a cancer. It eats away at its victim. It takes over their life. An addict’s life is solitary. Isolated. Lonely. They lead an entirely selfish existence. Their...

The most powerful love of all

Why did you have children with him? Good question. One that I have been asked so many times. A question I’ve ‘attempted’ to answer. If it was that bad, he...

Hearts and Flowers

From the outside it looked like I was the luckiest girl in the world. I drove a beautiful expensive car, had two homes, one in the UK and another abroad,...

Something so often over looked is how domestic violence affects everyone else other than the victim. The victim’s parents, grandparents, siblings, aunts, uncles, cousins, friends, even subsequent partners and their...

Silenced suffering

4.6 million women in England and Wales have experienced domestic abuse. One incident of domestic violence is reported to the police every minute. On average two women are killed every...